Migraine*

This blog may taper off….

I can feel a migraine starting to breathe behind my temples and up the right side of my skull; the skin along the crest of my right cheek is starting to numb. I am lucky. To date, the prescription meds — taken early enough — have always held the full-blown, blinding, chemical-burn-like, migraines at bay. But things are a bit different this time. This is not just a sinus-triggered migraine. It is not one of my unique, Big-Emotion triggered ones. It is emotion, plus sinus, plus stress, plus grief…I doubt medicine can dull all that.

I need to explore data on mindfulness and physical pain. I engaged in meditation for many reasons: to alleviate sadness; to assist general focus; to reduce stress, and to set aside depressed thoughts. PHYSICAL pain? Especially in my head region, it completely derails me.

I had heard stories from migraine sufferers growing up. The tale of a head banging into a wall is one that stands out in my memory. I assumed it was metaphorical. I know better now.

When I got my first migraine, I had no idea what was going on. It built up over several hours. First I took ibuprofen. Then I drank a lot of water. Then I tried Tylenol. And more Tylenol…By 10:00pm I was in a fetal position on the floor, barely able to see through tears welling relentlessly, trying to line up the grooves at the sides of my skull with the edge of the door and its jamb, thinking that if I could squeeze my head just right I might feel better…Thankfully, on some level I realized that was stupid. I then tried what was, in retrospect, equally stupid: I topped off all the previous meds with a behemoth shot of Nyquil. I don’t know if it made the migraine go away, but it did make me sleep.

My point being that pain in my skull makes me stupid. Hazardously stupid.

I now keep both prescription and over-the-counter medicines on me at all times. I am lucky that my migraines are usually distinctive in their start-up, so I can cut them off at the pass. But…but…The medicine I take (a generic of Imitrex) works for me, but what if some day it stops? How do I prevent the hazardous stupidity?

I know that for pain in other areas of the body I can get some relief through distraction. Burns, back pain, sprains – all can be almost forgotten if my mind becomes fully engaged in an activity. I need to progress my practice to alleviating pain within the region of my skull.

In fact, I need to practice it now.

Warned you this might taper off —-

*Migraine by Oliver Sacks is one of his early, lesser-know books. I have not read it. Why? Because upon glancing through it I realized that I did not want my brain to know how much MORE horrid things could be…